This Bulletin is from April 12th, 2011

April 2011

Dear Friends of German Comedy,

You will have noticed how over the past year the monthly bulletin got sent out later and later each month.
After last month’s almost debacle of the March bulletin not going out until the early hours of April I had to act. Decisively.
It was either sitting out one month and resume normal service on May 1st or showing some commitment and write three in modestly quick succession (of which this is the second).

Obviously if I were the Portuguese Comedy Ambassador I could simply have demanded another comic write my newsletter and then expected applause for admitting my incompetence.

Still being in Australia I’m a bit out the loop on current affairs in Britain but the one thing that gets coverage over here other than that tedious royal wedding saga is the News of The World phone hacking palaver.
I wonder why they bothered hacking into phones as from my own, admittedly very limited, experience they’re making it all up as they go along anyway.
In a weak moment I agreed to do a phone interview with the Scottish News Of The World in the run-up to last year’s England vs Germany match (anyone remember that?) and every single quote attributed to me in print was entirely made up, such as this one:
If I had a Euro for every time somebody in England mentioned 1966, I’d be a millionaire and I could afford to move somewhere else.

Not only does this make me sound extremely ungrateful to my adopted country but soft in the head, too. Why would anyone pay me one Euro, or any other amount, for someone mentioning 1966?
If I were in an office job I might chance my luck and sue my employer for harassment in the workplace on hearing anyone mention nineteen-sixty-sick but being self-employed I don’t quite know who to take to court.
At least I now understand why even articles consisting of nothing but quotes have a byline.
Never mind – the interview happened in the run-up to last year’s Edinburgh festival and as they say ‘it’s all good publicity’. Or is it?

I still need to have explained to me how being in or on something you wouldn’t read, watch or listen to is ‘good publicity’. At best it has no impact at all. At worst you have people in the audience who plan their leisure activities on recommendations by the NOWT.

And that’s not fair on the Jongleurs and Highlight comedy chains who are struggling even without greedy acts nicking their audiences.
That’s it for today. I have to dash to the pool so on my return to Blighty I look as tasty as the burgers at the Betsey Trotwood. (another seamless link, that!)

Have a great month


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